You have my deepest sympathy for this major esteem killer. Beware of the manager who craves constant updates, that magnifies minute errors, that trusts no one but themselves and their input. Like a Mosquito that drains your blood but is not satisfied till it flickers by your ears, buzzing, craving more and more.
Pardon my dramatics, but you must know the emotional and physical toll micromanagement has on individuals. Trust me! Been there, done that!! And I hope I never find myself in that position again.
It takes bright-eyed, optimistic, eager workers, crushes their spirit and makes them second-guess everything. I went from self-assured to timid in a blink of an eye. It started with little things like being asked to update my managers frequently (normal right?) but soon escalated to having all my emails proofread and then having client emails be dictated to me to write down. Which is crazy right? I have a degree in Literature!!
Suddenly I was doubting my ability to send simple messages. My heart pounded, and my hands shook at the thought of speaking with clients. What if I made a mistake? What if I stuttered? What if my manager disapproves of the way I convey the message? I was anxious. The work I easily did as an enthusiastic new employee now left me with crippling fear. I felt the heat of my eyes burning a hole into the back of my head. But the Manager’s desk is empty! All I knew was that I better check in with the boss before I make my move. But why?! This is what I was hired for. I had done the training and submitted great work. You might argue, ‘your manager just wants to give feedback and make sure the work reflects well on the company’. However, it’s to the point that my free thoughts and proactivity are stunted by the malicious thought ‘What if she doesn’t like it?’ And that’s where I found myself making more errors as I am not even trusted to send a simple email. I could see the disapproving frown before I even typed the first word. My thoughts were no longer mine. I found myself feeling dumber and dumber. And so the bright-eyed girl dimmed before her watchful manager’s gaze.
Micromanagement might seem as small as an annoying manager who likes to do too much. In reality, it’s a soul crusher. An esteem killer. Once it is done with you, you find yourself looking back at the person you were and wondering how you got into this mess. Anxiety and shame become your companions as you gingerly walk to your manager’s desk and ask them to proofread your email for the second time. What a shame.
Fear not! To tunnel yourself out of this environment, you must take ownership of your work and build confidence and conviction in your decisions. It’s not easy as I am still working on it, myself. The first step I took was being proactive. I don’t need my manager to tell me what to say to my clients via email or call. I thought I did because my manager needed to always be in control (their problem, not mine). Little steps like taking ownership of my words helped me build back confidence. I proactively wrote and edited my email and created little scripts to make me feel confident talking to clients.
The next step was to start backing up my ideas. If I had a good point, I was ready to defend it to my managers. Respectfully of course! Your management is meant to support you in your work, not do it for you. Defend your choices but be open to positive and helpful criticism.
Get ahead of your manager. You know they will ask you for your presentation/ document before your meetings so do not wait for them to ask. This only fuels their micromanaging. Anticipate their needs. It sounds tasking but for your peace of mind, projecting competence is key. Micromanagement feeds on perceived incompetence.
If all fails, you might have to have a meeting with your manager and higher-ups. Let them know how you are feeling and the impact on your work and well-being.
Once you’ve exhausted all this, start updating your CV!
Don’t underestimate the effects of poor management on your mental health!!
“None of us should wait to be told what to do, or how to do it. Micromanagement kills initiative, judgement, and creativity.”
-David H. Maister
5 thoughts on “So, You’re Being Micromanaged”
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What a fantastic read! So enjoyable and such an important subject.
Great job!!!
hmmm. should i comment? ok i love your insight you gave on your perception ( from an intimidated employee). i was able to understand your thinking, your fears and worries. which most managers dont see.But the coin has two side, from your literature you admitted that it made you up your ante and am sure that was the desired intention of your manager(as trust is earned). He or she is accountable to a superior who will hold them responsible even for your actions. How do we know that they are not being micromanaged by their superior as well?
This being said i believe micro managing should be limited to a learning period to help the employee understand how he want things done and like you did, the onus is on you to learn fast , earn his trust and take charge. unfortunately most people dont adjust which also opens another question, is there another way to achieve this without the initial oversight?
Although if you were hired for your experience then oversight like that will be antiproductive. As a yoruba adage goes ” you cant buy a dog and you start to bark” whats the use of the dog?.
love the yoruba adage I shall use in the near future for sure
Fantastic really relate to this your mental health really important, that’s where everything starts. Always look out for you where there is life there is life.
So, of course late to the party as usual, I extremely proud of depth of your writing super work.
Ok as a senior leader, I can say I potentially missed a trick for many years ago at middle management I probably did micro manage my team to some extent. My heart is broken over these terms soul crushing, esteem killing, shame and anxiety, these are NOT word emotions to be created in a work place. Funny enough exists at executive level of organisations too where lack of experience and proven worth are not a discuss right. Managers and leaders should take note and do better. And my last take on this is that all too often it is also a reflection of the managers insecurities about their abilities, and need to prove their worth to the organisation. Ok to share on my linked in…. HR needs to take note..